A few months ago the only houses flying union flags were the local EDL members. Now there can barely be a street in the UK that doesn’t feature a flag which has come to represent right-wing, racist nationalism. My gasts are literally flabbered that so many people can overlook this and fly the flag, having been fooled into thinking that it’s a positive gesture. But that’s the power of the Tory trick.
So, come on Britain. Time to get that union flag bunting down, please. And no need to clog up the landfills with this hazardous garbage. Here are a few suggestions for more neighbourly uses for your bunting.
- Use the back of it to write to your local MP, asking them help save your local libraries.
- Sew the triangles into a patchwork quilt, and send to your nearest cat shelter for the poor abandoned pussies to sleep on.
- Wrap it round your hot water pipe to avoid freezing up this winter.
- Cut it up into tiny pieces and leave it out for birds to line their nests with.
- Make a flour and water glue, and stick pieces of bunting over a balloon to make papier mache masks. Paint them, put them on your children, and send photos to firstname.lastname@example.org We’ll put your photos up on the site.
Ooo. And come to our gig tomorrow. It’s going to be the BEST ONE YET.