We see that William Wales, as he has styled himself, and Kate Middleton are getting hitched. If any of you has an ‘in’ at the Palace, can you let them know that Thee Faction are the perfect wedding band, particularly for Royal nuptials? We will tailor our set to suit the occasion, we promise. Every song will scream out exactly how we feel about the ceremony, the scale, and the class the whole thing represents. Of course, just as when his dad married Diana, this is a beautifully timed diversion to encourage us to avert our eyes from the class war their friends in the Tory party will be continuing to perpetrate. We can help with that. We promise not to point that out. We are happy to be complicit in this bourgeois sham. After all, it’ll be our taxes paying for it, and, as we keep being told, there’s not much in the pot. We’re all in this together, comrades. The Royal Wedding will demonstrate that public austerity perfectly, we’re sure.
So let’s start the campaign to get Thee Faction playing the reception. Given the constraints on the public purse, we’ll even do it for nothing. We are, after all, all in this together.
Wills/Kate – if you need a sample of our Socialist R&B, to convince your folks we’re the right band for the job, you can order one here.